Thursday, February 25, 2010

Haitian Kids Update



Waiting.

That's really where we're at right now.

Waiting to hear if the governments involved grant these children medical visas.

Our "packet" is in Haiti.

Seems super weird that our paperwork is there...our home study...our family picture...

The paper Hendricks are in Haiti. The flesh and bones Hendricks are here.

Waiting to hear.

Trying not to get discouraged.

Learning Creole.

Praying for God to help these people, and to use us in some way (big or small) to care for them.

This need for families to care for hurting children in Haiti coupled with the sermon series we're listening to below has totally shaken us.

Only God can shake you violently and lovingly.

One day I'm going to try and catch you up on what God's doing in our home and in our souls.

Right now we're busy praying, repenting, asking Jesus to grow our faith, and talking out life altering issues with people on this same terrifying, exciting journey.

I've never been more unsure and afraid of the future, and yet I've never felt so alive.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Haiti orphans facing neglect



Ryan sent this out yesterday.

Need something to pray about today?

Let's pray for Haiti.

Let's ask God to move us to action, to be willing to do whatever the Lord asks us to do to share His love and bring the hope of the gospel to this country.

Let's be women who are informed, who care about what's going on around the world, and who pray.

Proverbs 31:20
She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Radical is Wrecking Us


We've been listening to David Platt's "Radical" series.

I couldn't write yesterday.

I don't really want to write today either. My head is still spinning. But I think it would be good to stop and share some stuff. I have to constantly remind myself that the process is where I see Jesus. It's where we admit we have a hard time with the teachings of Christ, with saying no to our flesh. I never want to be one of those people who only display the finished product or the parts that finally said "yes" to Jesus. I wish we could all wiggle our noses and be more Christ like. The truth is...this journey is a rocky one at times. It's difficult. Yet God is evident in all the places between "here" and "there."

Our lives feel like they are turning upside down right now. You know, like the Kamikaze ride at the carnival? Like that. But there's less screaming, more crying, just as much nausea.

We're ashamed that it has taken us this many years of studying God's Word to ask one simple question...

"What if...and I know this sounds crazy....but what if Jesus means what He says?"

I mean for real. What if He means exactly what He says?

"You can't be my disciple unless you give up everything to follow me."

"Give to the poor."

"It's really hard for rich people to go to heaven."

"This is what TRUE religion looks like...care for the orphan and the widow. Keep yourself from being polluted by the world."

And yet how long have I claimed to follow Jesus and ignored the things He says?

Too long.

How many times have I said, "Well...that's what He says, but that can't be what He means?"

Too many times.

As if God, the author of communication lacks in His ability to communicate clearly?

Aaron and I have cried many tears over the last few days.

I don't think we're anywhere near done.

We're asking hard questions...make my stomach burn kind of questions...

Are we generous?

Do we need to sell our house?

Do we need to leave this country?

Do we care about the poor?

Do we love them?

Heck...do we even know anyone who is poor?

Does anyone poor even live in the US?

Do we care about the widow?

Do we serve them?

Do we care about the orphan?

Do we spend our lives defending them?

Lots of questions. We have so many questions.

When Jesus called the disciples He said..."Come, follow me." Immediately they left their boat (livelihood) and their father (family) and followed Him.

If Jesus asked me to do those things, would I?

We hate all the answers to those questions.

My "boat" is so full of crap that I love...I mean tons and tons of shiny, sparkly, soft stuff that I love. Could I turn away from it, leave it behind and follow Jesus?

What gets me most is this:

Until last week, I would have thought that living wholeheartedly for Jesus was what happens when you get older...grow deeper in your faith...walk with Jesus longer. I would have thought that living radically for Jesus is something that grew on you...like a fruit.

And yet, this is how Jesus introduces Himself to others in scripture...

"Hi. I'm Jesus. Give up everything you have...leave it all behind...even your family if need be...let go of all the things you're so attached to...and come follow me. Nice to meet you."

David Platt mentions that when Jesus says this crazy stuff in scripture (this isn't all the crazy stuff He says, just a few things) that He's not talking to seminary students, or elders, or people longing to go "a little deeper." He says those things during the introductory class to Christianity.

The saddest part of all...

Until last week, I thought I was pretty awesome.

I mean...I knew I had faults. I knew I "struggled." I knew I was a work in progress. I knew I was a big fat sinner in need of God's grace every day of my life.

But I could list you a whole ton of reasons why I thought I was following hard after Jesus even though none of those reasons would have been criteria for being a follower of Christ. Instead, we wanted a sticker for doing things like teaching our kids God's Word. We're doing Lent for heaven's sake. Someone put us on a poster. I'm laughing at myself!

I'm not saying those aren't good things. What I'm saying is those things are probably bottom shelf stuff for people who love Jesus. The things I've held onto as evidence that I'm following Jesus seem like dirty rags to me today.

At one point I could throw down all the "evidences of God's grace" in my life like nobody's business.

Today, the only evidence of grace I see in my life is this...

I'm still alive. He still calls me His own, even though I am living in absolute disobedience to just about everything clear and big scripture teaches about what it looks like to be a follower of Jesus. All the big things Jesus tells me to care about...I hardly care about those things. I don't spend my life caring for the poor, the widow or the orphan. The truth is, I have given up very little to follow Jesus, and my life on the outside looks very similar to the world around me. God has changed a lot of my insides, but the way we spend our money, the way we love ourselves and avoid the very people God says we're to spend our lives caring for is heartbreaking to me. Not only do I not serve them, I don't even think of them.

Works will never save us. I know that. God's gift of salvation is free. We're just admitting that maybe we've never really counted the cost to follow Jesus, like scripture commands.

I can't tell you how hard this series has been on us as a couple...but it is changing us, and for that I'm thankful. How terrible would it have been to live in this deception forever? How gracious is the Lord to teach us these things now? I've never been more aware of His grace, His mercy and how slow He is to anger.

We're not totally sure what sort of changes God is going to call us to make. But right now it's feeling like it might be something drastic.

Drastic scares me.

I highly recommend listening to the series below. (I'm laughing thinking about how crazy you'd have to be to listen to the series after I just said all this terrifying stuff...oh yes, Heather...sign me up to have my life all jacked up.) I recommend getting your friends to listen with you so you can work out all the things Jesus teaches in community.

I would be losing my mind right now if it wasn't for the people close to us who have listened to this series, are yearning to follow Jesus on His terms, admitting with us our weaknesses, our need for faith, our need for Jesus, crying with us, praying with us, talking about these things with one another, and seeking to live out the beauty of scripture.

Jesus, teach us to live. To truly live.

Friday, February 19, 2010

The First Day of the Rest of Our Lives?

It was just another Friday.

Until I started listening to this sermon.

Katie referenced these sermons on her blog.

I ignored them.

Don't be like me.

Please.

Listen.

Let's talk about what we hear.

Let's work this stuff out with one another.

Because many of you are pastor's wives...

Please share these with your husbands. Listen together.

Check out this church's website.

Notice anything strange?

No cute pictures of the pastor on the home page.

No snazzy "Look at how cool our church is" verbiage.

Instead...

The first thing you see on this church's website are updates about the poor...about suffering around the world...how to help the orphan...kingdom stuff like that.

This church's programs include foster care training.

Like nothing I've ever seen before.

Here's a link to all the sermons in the series. From what I understand, after this series, there was a major restructure in how this church did ministry.

RADICAL

Who will listen to these sermons with me?

For those of you considering this Haitian thing...this man is preaching to us. You'll be blessed.

I've cried all the way through this stuff. Lots of snot. Lots of tears. You'll need kleenex.

Do I even know what it means to be a follower of Christ? Not sure I do. Right now I'm too scared to want to know. Hard stuff. True stuff. Change your life stuff.

I don't think we can be the same after hearing what this man is teaching (and by man, I mean Jesus).

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Haitian Children Update

We need more families.

That's the bottom line.

There are 30 families ready to care for Haitian kids who need to come to our country for medical reasons.

We need 50.

For all of those who contacted us from Houston...this opportunity is now open to you.

Just so I get less hate mail:

There is an agency here in Texas working with an organization in Haiti to bring children over to the US for surgery and other medical needs.

This is very different than fostering for those of you familiar with that process. You will need some training, a home study, criminal background checks...stuff that you would need for an adoption. The difference is, you don't need money (like you would for an adoption). The other difference is, these kids will not be wards of the state. They won't belong to CPS. So, lots of the crazy rules and weirdness that go along with fostering won't be there. If you have fostered before you know what I'm talking about.

I'm about to leave the house, but if you are interested in this opportunity to care for Haiti's orphans and you live in or near Austin, Bryan/College Station, or Houston please contact me through EMAIL.

hendrickcrew@gmail.com

If we don't get 50 families, we've been told this can't happen. The kids can't come. I'm not trying to be dramatic here, but the truth is the kids will sit in Haiti suffering, many dying of silly things like infection when care is readily available for them here in the states.

Please pray about your involvement.

When I get home this afternoon, my goal is to sit down and write something about how hard of a decision this is.

We know.

We're struggling too.

This seems insane.

But I'm trusting that God will speak to each of us, and if He is prompting us to trust Him and do this crazy kingdom thing, that we will throw out our lists of why we can't and say yes...maybe a shaky, I'm scared, this makes me have diarrhea yes...but yes.

Please spread the word wisely.

I want God's people to know about this need, but I also want to protect these agencies from anything...any people...any powers that would come against what it is God is doing through them.

Monday, February 15, 2010

If You Live Here Locally...

Here are some cool things going on in our town:

PURSE PARTY TONIGHT

(for Heartline Ministries)


Last night I took the kids to Com Church to listen to the Livesay family. I've mentioned them several times on this blog. Troy Livesay spoke about the women's program at Heartline in Haiti. Their goal: teach women about the Lord, teach them to read, teach them skills, empowering them to provide for their children. I am very excited to share the work Heartline does tonight, celebrate these women, and pray over their lives.

MWANGAZA CHILDREN'S CHOIR

THIS Tuesday, February 16
7:00-8:30

Life Church


THIS IS A FREE SHOW TO SEE AN INCREDIBLE UGANDAN PERFORMANCE!

Mwangaza is the Swahili word for “shining light.” Mwangaza Children’s Choir is dedicated to sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ through song, dance and testimony, The group, based in Ggaba, Uganda, tours for Africa Renewal Ministries (ARM) to raise awareness and resources for churches, schools, orphanages, medical clinics and child sponsorships.

Check out their website to learn more about them.

We can't wait to hear these kids sing!

MASTERPIECE CONFERENCE



February 26-27
For girls ages 17-25
Registration is still open.
Check out the website for all the details.

I am extremely excited to spend the weekend with so many college girls I love. Cameron, Kirby and I will be serving in Part of the Solution. Come say hi if you're coming to Masterpiece!

I must say...I'm very impressed with this conference. What a beautiful display of creativity and how to use the gifts God has given women for His honor and fame. I'm also thrilled at how "outside of us" this conference is going to challenge young women to think. How exciting for women at a young age to learn to think globally. God is going to use this generation to do such beautiful kingdom work.

RUN FOR COMPASSION



Saturday, April 10
5K/10K
Benefiting Compassion's Child Survival Program
Check out all the good your entry fee for the race will do here.
Registration is open!

Our family will have to miss out on this year's race, but we are praying for lots of runners (and walkers).

Saturday, February 13, 2010

We Are the World. I Can't Resist.



Sorry...but I love this.

If you try really hard not think of how one of these celebrities could single-handedly lift a third world country out of poverty, then the song is really enjoyable. I even teared up a few times. Not gonna lie. Music does that to me.

I'll admit...I didn't know who some of these people were. Thankfully handy dandy Wikipedia has come through once again:

Soloists (in order of appearance)


Justin Bieber
Nicole Scherzinger
Jennifer Hudson
Jennifer Nettles
Josh Groban
Tony Bennett
Mary J. Blige
Michael Jackson (stock material only)
Janet Jackson
Barbra Streisand
Miley Cyrus
Enrique Iglesias
Jamie Foxx
Wyclef Jean
Adam Levine
P!nk
BeBe Winans
Usher
Celine Dion
Orianthi (on guitar)
Fergie
Nick Jonas
Toni Braxton
Mary Mary
Isaac Slade
Lil Wayne
Carlos Santana (solo with a guitar)
Akon
T-Pain
LL Cool J
Will.i.am
Snoop Dogg
Busta Rhymes
Swizz Beatz
Iyaz
Kanye West

For a list of the people in the chorus you can check it out at Wikipedia (you have to scroll down to the Haiti version).

If you're like me, then you have to watch the old "We Are the World." Go ahead...it's fun, and it's Saturday.



Can we all laugh about the sunglasses in both versions (I mean...at the random celebrities wearing them indoors. I'm not making fun of Stevie Wonder or Ray Charles. Not even I make fun of blind people. They can keep their sunglasses...but others? Celebrities can be so weird).

Now here is the game I'd like to play.

Who do you wish was in the new "We Are the World" that wasn't?

And...most importantly, who do you wish randomly appeared in the "chorus?"

Me...I kept waiting for Beyonce to slap some she-funk on this song, and I wish Zach Braff's face was randomly seen in the chorus (with his crazy eyes). It would be even better if "Turk" was standing next to him.

Aaron...he wishes Dwight Schrute had made an appearance. I'm about to pee my pants thinking of the camera scanning the chorus and seeing Dwight standing there (with his eyebrows raised, staring at the camera).

What about you?

Friday, February 12, 2010

Haitian Children Needing Medical Assistance Update

I have been overwhelmed by how many people have responded to this need.

I am taking the post down at this point. We've sent about 60 families to the agency to find out more about helping these kids.

At this point, the "ugliness" is coming out.

Apparently this post got twittered. We don't have twitter, so it wasn't us.

That's fine, and no one feel bad.

But...I don't have time today to deal with the people accusing me of handing Haitian kids to pedophiles. I can sort of understand the "concerns", (especially since I'm Baptist) but I also know the need is great, these kids are suffering, and wanted to spread the word to so many incredible families we know.

Obviously, for those of you who got the information you are aware...

We were putting families that we know in contact with a licensed agency working with the Haitian government to bring children over to the US who need medical care they can't receive in their country. No one fear. Although this is different than fostering, things like FBI fingerprinting, home studies by licensed agencies, background checks, and lots of other protective measures will be taken. The agency would like to place the kids in homes where parents are open to adoption in case that opportunity presents itself. That's wise. Who knows what the future holds, and we pray if these kids need forever homes that God provides those.

We didn't mention the agency's name online because we want to protect them from the ugliness.

Please pray with us at this point that God makes a way for these kids to get to the US and get the medical attention they need.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Don't Forget About the Purse Party!

Monday, February 15
7:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m.
Hendrick House

All the money will go to the women at Heartline Ministries.

We'll come together, shop, eat yummy snacks and then pray for Haiti.

Bring a friend!

For more information about Heartline in Haiti check out this post.

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

How Does Your Garden Grow?

Pretty stinkin' well, if I do say so myself.

And it's about time.

We've tried to get food out of our garden for years.

For years we have failed and thought over and over that if our life depended on our garden, the Hendricks would have died a long time ago.

The other night we ate a salad and everything (except the tomatoes) came from our backyard.

How exciting!

This salad contained lettuce, spinach, green onions, carrots, and broccoli.

We were in awe.

I added tomatoes that Jessie and I bought on our hippy trip to the local farmer's market.

Fun times.

I'm amazed at how plants like spinach, lettuce, broccoli and carrots can keep on thriving after several "freezes." They look so frail, and yet they are incredibly hardy.

I can't wait for our Spring garden.

If you are wanting to try your hand at a garden, right now is the time when you buy potatoes. From what I've heard potatoes are super easy to grow. You have to buy them now, and plant them in the ground Valentine's Day weekend.

Gardening has been great for my soul. I think there is something so good about digging in the earth and watching the natural cycles of life right in your own backyard. I think in our culture it's easy to live far from the earth, unattached to the life it brings and the lessons God teaches through His creation.

I know it sounds weird to say that growing a garden has been a very spiritual thing for me...but the truth is...it has.

Eating our first "this grew in our backyard" salad was more fulfilling and rewarding than I think any of us were expecting.

Anyone planting a garden this Spring?

I'm so ready for this winter to be over. I want to feel the sun on my skin and the earth in my hands.

Monday, February 08, 2010

Beware of Christians


The title alone could be a great discussion, no?

Last summer a college guy walked into our home. Small groups had started up at the church we attend. A new group of people were coming through our front door.

One of the girls sitting across the room from me caught my eye, looked over at this new guy and mouthed the words "He was in a movie."

I mouthed back..."A movie?"

she nodded her head.

"A real movie?"

she nodded her head again. Then she moved closer and said, "Like he makes real-life movies that are in the movie theater...and he's in them."

Monkey!

Try as I may to not really care about those kinds of things, the truth is, I do. I thought it was super cool that a movie guy had decided to join our church and become a part of our family's life. Judge me. Whatever.

Now the movie coolness has worn off. This guy is no longer "the guy who makes movies" to us. He's Michael Allen. Not Michael. Michael Allen. Because some people are "both names" kind of people. Michael Allen is one of those people. It feels good and right to say both names, so we do.

We love Michael Allen. We love his heart. We love his honesty. We love the 5 million questions (per week) he's asking about living a life that honors God. We love seeing him work this junk out with "fear and trembling." It's always refreshing to see anyone looking deep into scripture on a hunt for Jesus and the Way, desiring to live for the Kingdom...you know...the real Kingdom, not this earthly one.

There are times we think Michael Allen might be crazy. There are times we are sure of it. Every time we are around him we are thankful that we get a front row to hear his heart, and his convictions. We love listening as he hashes out hard topics with the Lord and God's people.

Long story short, Michael and his friends have made another movie.



coming to theaters soon!

I'll be honest (I hope you don't expect anything less).

My first reaction to four college guys trying to figure out life and tell the rest of the world how to live it was an eye roll.

Seriously?

It can almost seem comical.

How can four college guys, unfamiliar with the real world, providing for themselves or others, going to discover anything monumental about living for God by traveling around Europe for a summer (how did they pay for this)? Seems like idealism on steroids. That sounds kind of mean, and my many assumptions may be way off, but I said I was going to be honest...I have my own questions.

One of the questions I've been asking is...when did I get so old that these guys seem so young? If I start using the phrase, "whipper snapper" please...someone...for the love...put me "down" or something.

Aaron and I watched their first documentary, "One Nation Under God." We went into it with the same sort of critical eye, yet hopefully willing to learn. We may not have walked away with all the messages that we were intended to walk away with, but we did leave that film with a lot of treasure. It was refreshing to see a group of believers asking real questions, trying to live out the beauty of scripture.

We're excited to watch Beware of Christians.

The trailer makes it sound like this is a group of four renegades who want to chunk out all the things their parents and the church have taught them about following Jesus and find their own way. If we didn't know Michael we would walk into this film very skeptical because of some things they say in the trailer. We are probably pretty skeptical of anyone (or four someones) claiming to have discovered anything worthwhile without the influence of older, godly people and apart from the church that Jesus loves so much He gave His life up for it. We have our own questions that hopefully the film will answer. We're all for challenging tradition, and really rethinking the reasons why we do what we do (or don't do what we should do) but we also love community and the body of Christ. I hope all those elements come out in the film.

Because we know Michael we will watch this movie ready to listen...to hear...to understand where these guys are coming from and find out how we can walk this road with them as one body. Michael loves Jesus. He loves the gospel. He's not afraid to let Jesus totally jack his life up as he learns to follow Him.

I think these guys will ask some hard questions. I hope they do.

Questions can sometimes be threatening, but I try to remember that the Bible is a huge story, and it is filled with people asking questions...asking God questions...asking Jesus questions...and so I want to be more comfortable being questioned and asking them myself. For the Bible to be a big book of people asking hard questions, sometimes the church is one of the hardest places to ask them.

I think everyone who loves the church should watch this movie, if not to ask the same questions, then to know what questions parts of our body are asking. Maybe after we watch this movie, we'll see some areas where these young men need more wisdom or their perspective challenged and broadened. Maybe we'll see where we need more wisdom, more honesty, and need our perspective to be challenged and broadened.

For sure I think we can rejoice as believers that God has redeemed, in small part, the movie making industry with films like this. I'm praying the gospel is shared, that Jesus is seen, that "religion" like that of the Pharisees is mocked and confronted the same way Jesus mocked and confronted white washed walls whose hearts are filthy and far from Him.

Bottom line...

I love questions, and although I'm not expecting these young men to ask all the right ones or come to all the right conclusions, it does get me excited any time people look around this world, see how hypocritical we all can be, ask questions, look to Jesus for answers and begin to live out their convictions and CHANGE.

Questions

Looking to the cross for answers

Change

All good things

Doesn't the last line in the trailer make your stomach hurt a little? or a lot?

Will you help spread the word about this movie?

Do you want me to get you Michael Allen's autograph? If he writes his name on his cup at our house this week, I'll save it for you. I already told him I'm saving all "Michael Allen" paraphernalia so I can sell it on ebay one day when he's big and famous.

Friday, February 05, 2010

Saturday Yum

The pancake recipe I'm about to give you puts these pancakes to shame.

As most of you know, I've been on a journey to get rid of "all things weird and processed" from my family's diets.

This means learning to make more foods from scratch (which by the way, always taste better I'm finding).

I have always been a Bisquick girl.

I use Bisquick to make chicken n' dumplings (one of my family's favorite meal), waffles and pancakes.

Well, I decided a few months ago that I wasn't using Bisquick anymore. Yep. I'm kickin' it to the Bisquick man.

One of the great things about learning to cook from scratch is that you realize how much more money it costs to buy processed foods. Bisquick is expensive. I realized I was paying a company to mix my flour and baking powder (and other chemicals) for me. No thank you company. I'll mix my flour and baking powder myself and leave out the cancer.

No joke. I always thought eating healthier was more expensive.

I'm finding that it isn't.

As a matter of fact, we eat really well around here and I've been able to cut my grocery store budget to around $100 a week for our family and that includes diapers, toilet paper and other household and toiletry items.

Pretty awesome, no?

I'm slowly learning that it doesn't cost as much to have a pantry filled with whole ingredients. I'm also learning that I like the foods better that we're eating, and once you get into the "flow" of eating differently it really doesn't take more time or money. I was really skeptical about this, but I've been relieved lately to see eating healthier wasn't as awful as I thought it was going to be for our family.

I recently found THE BEST...and I mean THE BEST pancake recipe.

Seriously...these pancakes make the Bisquick pancakes seem extraordinarily sad.

Thought I would share these pancakes today in case you want to make them for your family (or roommates) in the morning. Much love and raving will be the result.

For regular pancakes...

1 1/2 cup flour (I used white, but next time I'm using wheat)
3 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. salt
1 T sugar
1 1/4 c. milk
1 egg
3 T melted butter

Mix dry ingredients. Mix wet ingredients in separate bowl. Then mix the two together.

For our favorite kind...banana/cinnamon pancakes...

1 1/2 cup flour (I used white, but next time I'm using wheat)
3 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. salt
1 T Sugar
1 T Cinnamon
1 tsp. vanilla
1 1/4 c. milk
1 banana, mashed
3 T melted butter

Mix dry ingredients. Mix wet ingredients in separate bowl. Then mix the two together.

I times this recipe by four. That way we have a bunch to eat for dinner (or breakfast), plus a few mornings worth of pancakes with the leftovers.

These are the fattest, fluffiest, most divine pancakes you'll ever make. Promise.

You can buy maple syrup for a great price at Sams. There was also a fantastic deal on maple syrup through Amazon, but I can't find the details now. Anyone remember seeing that on Mommy Snacks or Money Saving Mom recently?

Now I just have to figure out how to make Chicken n' dumplings without Bisquick...always learning something new around here.

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Not a Baby


I've been tired for months now. Like "I have a newborn tired" or "I'm pregnant tired."

The problem is, I don't have a newborn, and I'm not pregnant.

No matter what I do, no matter how much rest I get, I'm still tired.

Exercise makes me feel worse. Usually exercise makes me feel great (well, not in the moment, but later I feel terrific). I've still be doing The Shred, because I'm really seeing results, but after I'm done I have seriously found myself, several times, wondering why humans don't get to hibernate. Bottom line, exercising makes me jealous of bears.

I've had no energy.

I kept blaming these symptoms on some hard things going on with homeschooling, relationships...you all know...things have been pretty "off" in lots of areas in my life lately.

I also quit drinking caffeine. I was highly addicted. So I kept thinking that maybe I was tired all the time because I was still in withdrawals from the lack of coffee. Then it dawned on me that I quit caffeine back in August. Surely no one on earth is that addicted to caffeine that they can't function for six months after they quit the stuff. (I still drink decaf, have no fear.)

I finally decided to go to the doctor. I mean seriously, when you want to climb into your baby's bed with him for his morning nap, there's probably something wrong with you.

Especially if you are getting plenty of rest, eating pretty healthy (minus the blue bell ice cream) and exercising several times a week (because of all that blue bell). No joke...I was doing all that healthy stuff, not because I'm Mrs. perfect, but because I felt awful and knew those things were supposed to make me feel better.

At the doctor's office they handed me the "what's up with you paper." I wrote, "I'm here because I probably have cancer."

I mean really, what else could it be? What else could anything be if you're me?

The peeps at Abundant Life Family Practice are used to my fear of cancer.

When I saw Dr. Bacak I told him I didn't really know what all my symptoms were, but I'm just tired of feeling like crap.

He said I could either be anemic, have chronic mono, or have a thyroid issue...or none of those things.

No one in my family has a thyroid issue (that I know of) but I think the desire for a thyroid issue is pretty universal.

Who doesn't want to eat Cheetos all day, take a pill and be skinny?

I had my fingers crossed, "Thyroid..thyroid...please let it be the thyroid."

I was imagining all the chocolate I was going to eat while wearing tiny jeans.

I don't have a thyroid issue though. I'm never that lucky...what was I thinking?

I am anemic and I DO have mono. Like the real mono, not the chronic kind. I have the mono that girls who need more adult supervision in high school get. Awesome.

I always wanted mono in high school. Then I could stay home from school and sleep for a month and people would think I had a boyfriend. As a mother of four kids, mono is not nearly as cool.

This whole time I thought I was tired because I have four crazy kids and a very full life.

I guess the kind of tired where your eyes start burning at 10 a.m. is probably a little over the top though.

I've felt like a big baby lately. All I want to do is sit on the couch. That's so not like me. Naturally, I'm more like a squirrel...or a bouncy ball. I have whatever sin issue is the antonym for laziness. But I've been so tired lately that I've even flaked out in my thoughts, not just in my actions. I'm too tired to even think about all the things I'm not going to end up doing. Now that's tired.

Today I start taking iron and naps.

This might be the second best thing to a thyroid issue.

I am getting me a t-shirt made that says, "I'm not a baby. I have mono."

Although having real live stuff wrong with me kind of stinks, it's also great to know I wasn't losing what's left of my mind. It's good to know that no matter how hard I tried, there was a reason things were not getting better. Praise God for pills and prescribed napping. Even better...praise God my worth is wrapped up in Christ, not in a clean house or all the other 900 things I enjoy doing that have been left undone lately. That's humbling, but oh so good for me.

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Movie Review


loved it.

as in

Lu-huved it.

We had a great time with friends last night watching No Impact Man. Here's a photo of some us from Jessie's photo blog.
We viewed the movie at an off campus dorm.

The dorm is super fancy and cool.

Right when we walked in, I asked Aaron if we could move there.

Wouldn't that be fun?

They cook all your food for you.

Sign me up.

The movie room was incredible.

The perfect place to watch a great movie with a bunch of great friends.

I'll have to break up my thoughts about this movie into several posts.

WAY too much to process at one time.

I'll work my way through my thoughts from littlest to biggest.

Here's where I'll start...

This family set out to make no impact on the earth for one full year.

This meant drastic changes.

I mean drastic...no tv, no buying anything new for a year (or really even used), no trash making, no meat, no vehicles, no eating out, no electricity...eating only local, seasonal foods, see...I told you...drastic.

They live in New York City.

Everything about the way they lived had to change for this project. Completely change.

There's this scene where the family is together, outside at a fountain in the middle of the city.

The wife, Michelle is talking about how their electricity is off. Everything that kept them inside has been stripped away from them, so they are outside more.

They want to be outdoors in the sunlight, with people and with each other.

At this point Michelle said something I hope I never forget...

"The days seem to last forever."

How many times do I hear myself say, "Time is going by too quickly. My kids are growing up too fast. The last three years feel like a blur to me."

I say those things a lot.

Something must be very different about my life when compared to Michelle's. Her days seem to go on forever. She feels like she has so much time...the days drag on.

I've not had a dragging day since elementary school.

Michelle's statement has me thinking...deeply thinking...

What is eating up my time and my life? What is making my days fly by so fast I swear I feel like I'm running after them, hard as I can, and yet I feel like I can never catch up.

We're told all these modern day conveniences are here to make our life easier...and better.

I don't think after living one full year in absolute simplicity that this couple in this movie would agree.

With no electricity, no cars, no tv, no internet, no shopping, not much crap to take care of, this mother said...

"The days go on forever."

She didn't mean that in a negative way. She meant she had been given the gift of time, of feeling like there were more than enough hours in her day to do what was important.

I can't say the same for my life.

And so here I am today asking the Lord to give me fresh eyes...

How is the enemy stealing my days? How is he robbing me of moments with my children, of time with people?

How is my lack of time and my excess of "stuff" linked together?

Living simply, Michelle said her days seem to go on forever.

Incredible. I'm going to think on that for awhile.

And then, because these people have inspired me, I hope I don't stop with thinking. Thinking is great but sometimes thinking is too safe. This world is already bubbling over, like peroxide on a wound, with people who "think" things, but don't live out their own thoughts and convictions. This couple in "No Impact Man" have taught me that thinking isn't enough. If I think something, why not move from thought to action?

Monday, February 01, 2010

No Impact Man Tonight


We're watching this tonight and then discussing with friends.

7:00

Cambridge House Movie Room

Here's a map to the location.

Here's a link to a post with more information.