Friday, May 07, 2010
Days Like Today....
malaria meds? check
typhoid meds? check
tetanus shot? check
bug spray? check
I'm finishing up the packing this morning
not looking forward to kissing my babies goodbye today.
Have we ever left them this long before?
I'm trying to remember.
Not Hudson...for sure. I think he's only spent one night away from us. The only time we left him for the night with someone else, was also the only time he has ever had explosive diarrhea in his bed. Poor Crystal.
I'm battling thoughts this morning.
Thoughts that hit mothers in the middle of the night before a trip away from her children.
Thoughts that only seem to creep into a mother's mind when an open, half-packed suitcase sits at the foot of her bed.
I hate those thoughts.
I've been emotional this morning as I finish packing, finish writing up notes for Aaron's mom...my gosh, I'm so thankful for this woman.
Jesus...keep us safe. Please bring us home to these boys. Please.
Do they know how much I love them? Have I told them enough? Have I shown them enough?
All that time I've spent doing other things besides loving them seems stupid now.
I'm asking God for grace this morning...
Grace for all the things I wish I would have done differently if something were to happen to us this week.
Grace to take these thoughts captive, remembering that God loves my sons more than I do. That's so hard to fathom. No matter what this week holds...or today..or tomorrow...He has a precious plan for all of us. All of our days have been ordained, every word known by our God before it ever leaves our mouths...what comfort that brings a mother's soul on days like today.
Nothing like a suitcase to make you rejoice in the sovereignty of God.
Hopefully I can start resting in how big God is...how He's in control of airplanes, Haitian drivers, and mosquitoes so I can move on to thinking about other things...
Like how my unpredictable, mind-of-its-own, prone to naughtiness head of hair is going to behave in Haiti.