Monday, September 17, 2007

a love poem

my heart goes thumpy
for an onyx oval of jumpy

I want to hug it's netting
lovingly carress it's padding
squeeze those sexy springs
know what I mean?


I have a crush on a trampoline

oh trampoline, oh trampoline

bouncy bouncy nap machine
you make crazy boys sleepy
it makes my eyes weepy

i love you round, jumpy thing

if you weren't so heavy

i'd take you to the movies

if you could chew
i'd make you some stew
if you could pee

i'd fill you with sweet tea

is it wrong to have a fling
with a trampoline?

when these males are being mean
sword fighting with breakable things

i point outside and yell "go trampoline!"
when they are too insane to learn their states
won't sit still...can't concentrate
i point...scream..."go trampoline!"
you make me steam

marvelous hunk of trampoline


I had to write a quick love poem to our trampoline.

I am no good at writing poetry...but that's what you do when you are in love.

My precious Aunt and Uncle sent this bouncy, blessed object to the boys last week.

A trampoline came in the mail! It was like the circus was unloading at our house. We were that excited!

We are so thankful for this wonderful gift. Now the boys can jump their little hearts out...


I mean these boys...

As the mother of three mini-men...hear me say this...if you also have more than two little boys running around your house...I believe that if you have to sell a vehicle...or your afford a trampoline...don't even hesitate. I guarantee will be money well spent.

If a mother is pregnant with her third boy, I will RALLY and raise support to present that sweet woman a TRAMPOLINE at her baby shower.

She doesn't need clothes or toys or pacifiers or diapers.

That girl needs a trampoline.

I will smile at that tired lady, hug her...think of how marvelous it is to mother boys...I'll think of how sweet their hugs tender and simple...but then I'll think of all the frogs this innocent woman will find in pockets, all the bruises, the million jackets she will buy, put on her sons and never see again...all the times she will keep a spoon in her back pocket, all the nasty things she will discover in their beds and say, "'s okay to have an unhealthy affection for a trampoline. It's okay. Nowhere in the Bible does it say thou shalt not adore a trampoline."

When the boys ask, "Can we go jump on the trampoline?" I say..."Yes! But only if you promise to jump until your legs go numb and you think your lungs are going to collapse...okay!" They run out excited to obey me!

Then...and this will shock some of you who have boys, still have your liver, two cars and no trampoline...

Anson, Hayden and Ashton come inside, hot and sweaty and say, "Can I lay down and look at a magazine?"

My eyes teared up the first time this happened.

Lay down?

Look at a magazine?

I almost ran out of the door, grabbed that trampoline and french kissed it.

I'm not lying.

One day, Ashton came in, after jumping ALL MORNING LONG while I was doing school with Anson and Hayden and said..." it almost nap time?"

It was only 11:30 a.m.


My eyes teared up...and I winked at the trampoline...and blew it a kiss.

And do you know what else has been my favorite thing about having that wonderful object in our backyard?

All the trampoline stories people seem to have.

I've always hated jumping on trampolines...when I jump on them, I swear my brain is going to shoot out of the top of my head, or worse...I'm going to swallow it.

So I don't have any trampoline stories.

But other people have great ones...and they get told almost every day around here.

The kids say to every person the moment they set foot in our house, "We have a trampoline. Want to come jump with me?"

Then...the person who is getting sucka-ed into jumping says, "We had a trampoline growing up...and one time..."

I love the stories.

I love how my Aunt and Uncle thought they were buying this trampoline for the kids...

but just as many big people have been jumping on it as little people...

and how sometimes, I stand at the back door...see that beautiful, black stud out there...put my hand on the glass...and just pause...and thank God for whatever that material is that sucks the energy right out of tireless, little bodies.


D.O. said...

I've got lots of stories. They're all summed up in the statement: I love trampolines.

I've always desired to have (at least) an indoor, inground, rectangular trampoline in my house some day. At most I'd like to have a trampoline room with 2" foam padding on the walls allowing you to do flips on to and off of the walls. Yep.

theBirkenfelds said...

Well, our foreign exchange student from Germany, Andre, always did this cool move where he would sprint and jump from the ground onto the trampoline with one foot like jumping over a hurdle.

As a five/six year old, it was quite amazing for me to see. (I was the kindergartener, he was like 17..)

Well one time he didn't quite make it and his foot landed in between the metal border and the tarp in between springs. (Don't think we had one of those airbag pads like Charlie called them covering the springs) Andre ended up hanging upside down with his foot stuck but somehow he didn't break his ankle or anything. Instead of helping him, I just had to run inside and tell Mom. I was more amazed by the coolness of it than scared for his safety.

With all the precautions surrounding today's trampolines, such a move will only be found in the history books it seems...

Jennifer Bacak said...

I know, didn't I tell you? All four of my kids...well five when Rusty's home...get on there just about everyday and wear themelves out. Good times. When they're all on the trampoline, it is quiet in the house. Priceless quiet moments. So worth it!

Ber said...

i broke an elbow and two wrists on tramps when i was little.

maybe you should be french kissing the net around the trampoline, vs. the actual trampoline itself.


The Kramer Family said...

I'm sooo boring!

I recall maybe jumping on a trampoline in gymnastics class and one other time at my Aunt's. I knew absolutely no one who had one in their backyard growing up as a child.

I totally missed out! I need to come over and make up for lost time on yours. Maybe the boys could teach me some moves.

the amy's said...

I guess I know what I am getting for a shower gift. YEAH! I just hope I have a backyard to put it in. Oh and is true that there will be nasty things in their BEDS??? YUCK! Pockets I can handle, but their beds? Tell me it's not so. PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!

Karen said...

I love trampolines! I actually got one last year for my birthday! Just what every girl needs for her 23rd! Ha! I guess I will be prepared if God blesses me with lots of little boys then!

Bev Brandon said...

Okay, you just struck such fear in this older mother's kids ended up in the ER on their trampoline visits...and fear whooshed over me for you---not a trampoline---but you have to remember I am a baby boomer mother who has never seen such a contraption as the one you posted---now that is a terrrrrific trrrrampoline WITH WALLS---HOW INGENUOUS...maybe they have been out for years but it looks post modern to this mother...yes, a "post modern" trampoline...i'll take one of those anyday...did I see D.O. on the post-modern trampoline??

Anonymous said...

As a fellow mother of 3 boys, I have many, many stories to share at another time. But I did want to share that if you add soap (dawn, joy, etc..) and water you have an instant slip and slide.

Judy said...

We had a trampoline growing up and have many memories with that thing! We even got sleeping bags and camped out on it at night when it was cool. Have you played "crack the egg" yet?

Hendrick Family said...

We will DEFINITELY be doing the Dawn.

So fun!!


Karen said...

My sister and I used to put the sprinkler under the trampoline ... way fun!