I've always had a list of things I swore I would never, never do.
That list is getting shorter and shorter the longer I'm married to Aaron.
I thought I would never marry someone younger than myself. He's 6 months younger.
I thought I would never allow my kids to own a tarantula.
There's one sitting in a bug keeper IN MY HOTEL ROOM.
Our boys have always wanted one.
Anson has been asking for a tarantula since he was about three.
Our answer...no way.
We were a united front.
We have stood in Petco, holding hands, shaking our heads in unison with three little boys looking up at us, pleading their case with their eyes...and their mouths...and their legs.
They did not faze us. Just say no to tarantulas...that was our motto.
Dobson and Tripp would have been so proud of us...protesting together.
THEN, yesterday we went to the Austin Zoo...thanks for the recommendations you guys...it was wonderful.
The Austin zoo is the soupus equivalent...so we named it the zoopus.
It's tiny...there are only a handful of animals...and the handful of animals are all deformed. It was oddtastic. We go for oddtastic.
We had a fabulous time.
The soupus and the zoopus are both as entertaining and enjoyable as their circus and zoo counterparts...just in completely different ways.
While at the zoopus, there we were, just walking along, having a lovely time crunching the dirt beneath our feet...looking at the two headed monkeys...strolling around with marvelous Matt Graham...and that's when it happened...
Hayden started screaming with utter excitement, terror and joy. It was a great combination.
We saw a TARANTULA running after him along the path.
I'm not even kidding. It was chasing him.
Aaron went running towards the spider...which in itself was unnatural to me...the spider turned on Aaron...started running up to him...walks right up to his feet...Aaron dumps out this white bag of petting zoo food he was holding...looks down and the spider of death was raising it's two front hairy legs up in the air, right at the toe of Aaron's shoe. Aaron set down the bag and the spider walked in.
That all happened in about 3 frantic, insane seconds.
I was trying to take pictures...screaming...would sort of get the camera to focus and then I would scream and shake...and cringe...so all the pictures are awful.
After it was over, Aaron held the tarantula in a little white lunch sack.
It was so exciting...but then it hit me...
What were we doing? Why was that tarantula in a bag and why was Aaron handing that bag to Hayden....why was Hayden jumping up and down asking, "Can I keep it, can I keep it? Why was Aaron, still high on the arachnid adrenaline nodding yes....wait...wait...WAIT!!! It was like one of those slow motion moments, where I watched them from a distance, and on the inside I was screaming a slow...Incredible Hulk, guttural N-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O as the white bag passed from lunatic father to nature loving son.
"We are NOT keeping that thing, Aaron."
"Yes we are!" Aaron says...so excited...he looked shocked that I would even suggest something different.
I felt like the zoopus was spinning. What was going on?
The boys walked around with that nasty bag at the zoo until it was time to go.
Actually, we had to leave because it started raining.
What's the deal with the rain, by the way? Did the equator move, and no one told me? I don't watch the news, so being out of the loop is normal for me...but really...if something as huge as the equator relocating were to happen, I would need my news savvy friends to share the Britt Hume and tell me.
We got in the car.
With the spider in a BAG...a non metal bag...without a lid.
It was too much for me. What if it got out and touched me...I would jump right out of the car into traffic...no question about it. I would die...and the spider would have to wipe Ashton's hiney, sleep with Aaron and homeschool our children.
We don't have a mom...but we do have a spider....that would be their new motto.
The boys put it in a rubbermaid wipe's container with a lid for the car ride.
Anson says, "Isn't it cool mom, that we caught a tarantula?"
"No. It's not cool to me. "
I respectfully, but a little on edge told Aaron..."Honey...the boys have always wanted a tarantula, and we've always said no."
"But this one was free!" he said.
"So MONEY was the only reason why you were saying no all those years?"
He thinks for a second and then says..."I guess so!"
"Well it's not the only reason I was saying no."
"You have to keep it. It was chasing Hayden and then walked up to Aaron and lifted it's arms...like it was saying, 'hold me' says Matt Graham. "It's destiny." I wanted to kick his seat.
The boys named the Tarantula, High Five.
On the way to Petco to buy it a "habitat", Anson said...
"So now...maybe one day we can get a scorpion."
I said, "Well I guess maybe one day we can, since before about 10 minutes ago, I thought we weren't going to get a scorpion because they are disgusting, I hate them and they should all be killed...but maybe Dad has another reason why we aren't getting a scorpion...so since I don't know the reasons behind the rules, I obviously don't know the loopholes of these laws either...so I guess I can never say never."
There is now a tarantula in our hotel room in a habitat.
A tarantula...which sounds like Dracula...who wants EITHER of those things in their hotel room?
It looks just like this picture...only it's moving and I can't make it disappear by clicking on someone else's blog...and that makes it even more terrifying
I checked the lid twice before I went to bed and asked Aaron to check it a third time.
The moral of this story is...I figure it can be an Aesop's Fable since there's an animal in it...
This craziness has made me realize that I need to communicate the WHY behind the input I'm giving my husband when we are making decisions. It's not enough to just be on the same team, as this story illustrates somewhat perfectly. If I would have known that the only tarantula the boys could NOT have was one that would cost money, instead of trying to take panicked pictures yesterday of this eight-legged beast, I would have picked up a rock and thrown it at the spider...and if that wouldn't work...I would have thrown the rock at Aaron...just hard enough to stun him long enough for me to yell..."Run spider Run!!"
So...you see boys and girls what happens when you don't communicate with your spouse clearly and completely?
Tarantulas...that's what happens.
Aaron has asked me if I really want him to let it go...but now I know Hayden would be beyond devastated. I will have to be tough.
11 years of marriage and we still stink at this! Aaron's only reason for not buying the boys a spider was that it was a waste of money. Money. My reasons had NOTHING to do with money. I would pay money right now for someone to take this tarantula FROM us. The problem...I never told Aaron WHY I didn't want us to have a tarantula. We both assumed the other knew the reasons behind our united decision. During a crazy moment with a spider chasing our son, a white lunch sack, a bouncing boy and a screaming mother...our miscommunication became quite obvious! Aaron handed the sack to Hayden who was BEAMING. There was no turning back now. High Five would be a Hendrick.
I will be talking Aaron's ears off from now on...I will write up all the reasons behind what I'm thinking. It's not enough to just be on the same page...every line needs to be read in the novel called each other. True intimacy...unity...becoming so one that we not only end at the same conclusion...we understand what road one another took to get there.
Another bump, in the shape of a tarantula on this road to becoming one.
We will overcome.
We will learn.
High Five will sleep on the porch under lock and chain.