Saturday, July 07, 2007

Haydenisms

This kid is so funny.

His job in our house is to make us laugh.

I love his knock knock jokes.

I love that he is his best audience.

It doesn't matter if anyone else laughs...he laughs...and that's all he cares about.

Last night, Aaron was working on the apartment next door, so it was just me and the boys eating dinner together.

Hayden says...in a very loud, dramatic way, of course...

"I know a game we can play! Guess what song I'm singing."

Then do you know what he did?

He just sat there.

Perfectly still.

Looking at us.

Waiting.

We waited too. Surely something was about to happen.

Silence.

Then Hayden said, "Do you give up?"

This is when it became clear to us what was going on. Anson was NOT impressed with this game.

He said, "Hayden. You have to do something."

Hayden said, "No. The game is, you guess what song I'm singing."

Then Hayden sat still and silent again. Waiting.

Anson looks over at me, shakes his head and then says, "Hayden...this is impossible."

I said, "Hayden, are you going to move your mouth or tap a beat or something?"

Hayden, getting a little irritated at us, sighs and says, "No. That's not how you play this game. In this game, you just guess what song I'm singing."

Anson goes back to eating and says, "That's impossible Hayden. There's no way to guess if you're not going to do SOMETHING."

Then I say, in a tone of voice that means, surely you haven't thought this game through very well..."Hayden, are we just supposed to read your mind?" I thought for sure he would see the error of his ways and understand that this game needed to go back to the drawing board...but no...instead he said...

"YES!" He was so excited! He was relieved that I now understood his game...that we could finally get back to playing it now that his silly family now understood his rules. It never occurred to him that his rules were insane. So he went back to...

sitting...

waiting...

ready for us to guess.

After guessing about 19,000 songs, we had to finally give up. His song was "You can't touch this."

Speaking of music...got to love this MP3 player child.

He is constantly hooked up to one.

The other day, he walked into the bathroom where I was getting ready and said, "Mom. I need some Joss Stone on this thing."

I wanted to squeeze his guts out he's so cute.

Then, in the middle of the night last night, he comes into our room BAWLING.

I mean BAWLING.

He had a bad dream.

I held him in my bed and asked him what his dream was about and he could barely get out these words through his choking sobs...

"I dreamed Anson died."

I can't explain to you how upset he was.

I let him sleep the remainder of the night in our bed.

When he woke up, he walked right into the living room and climbed in my lap.

"I had a bad dream last night," was the first thing he said.

I held him, rubbed his back and asked him to tell me all about it.

He said...having to pause to keep from crying again...

"Anson died."

I continued to rock him, playing with his hair, watching his sad face and said, "That's so sad, Hayden. What happened in your dream?"

He said, "Anson was in the bathroom..."

"Yeah...I said..." I could think of lots of horrible things that could happen in a bathroom. Don't all scary movies have at least ONE bathroom part?

But then Hayden says, "And then Anson wanted to see if he could put his toothbrush down his throat...so he stuck it down there and he started choking..."

Hayden started crying again. No joke.

"And then he couldn't get it out, and he fell on the floor and I couldn't get it out either."

Crying.

"And then he Diiiiiieeeed." Lots of crying.

And then I did something only awful mothers do who have horribly funny children.

I started laughing.

Laughing hard.

Holding Hayden and laughing while he cried.

But then he started laughing.

And then I made him go find Aaron and tell him his dream.

And then Aaron tried to tell Hayden that was a really sad dream, but could barely say that because Aaron was trying so hard to quit smiling.

Even Hayden's nightmares are hilarious.

We love that kid!

9 comments:

The Campbell Clan said...

That is so sweet. And funny! Josh and I do that too. Something that is supposed to be serious and we can't help but laugh. But, like with Hayden, it usually makes them laugh too. Kids can be pretty funny!
Also, I'm glad that I'm not the only mom who wants to squeeze their kids when they are cute. I tell Jack a lot that he is so cute I just want to squeeze him.
sarah

Ryan Price said...

Wow... I love that kid!! And can totally picture all of that happening in his little world...

Sara and I were sitting here having a late night laugh about this whole thing. I'm really beginning to wonder what ya'll are putting in to that kid... he seems to produce some of the most bizzare thought patterns. Maybe it was all those years of being on supplements only or something... or maybe it's just that his parents are Aaron and Heather! I'm banking on the later actually.

See you guys...

D.O. said...

I love you people.

Did you go back and tag labels to all of your posts? I've thought of doing that... is it worth it?

Hendrick Family said...

D.O.! Yes...I am slowly labeling my posts. I'm not sure what that's supposed to do though. All I know is that I started, so now I want to finish...but for no good reason! I'm not sure what the point of labeling is. Do you know?

Garratts said...

This is why we think you are so great Hayden.

And this is why Reese thinks you are the coolest guy to walk planet earth.

Ya'll are 2 peas!
Ashley

King Family said...

I love your Haydenisms. That dream is so sad, but I know what you mean about laughing when you're not supposed to. The other day, I was outside with Sam and I was teaching him what to do if a stranger pulls in front of our house. I was trying to be serious and was asking him questions like, "what do you do if a man pulls up and says... i have some really cute puppies in my car-do you want to see them?" But Sam got the cutest expression on his face and said, "YES.. I would go look." I then tried really hard not to laugh because that's HORRIBLE that he would go look and we started going through what he should do. Then we repeated it with drums, candy, etc. until he understood he should never go no matter how great it sounds. Then I made him practice what he should do...run into the house screaming. It was soooo funny. The entire time we were acting it out, I was laughing so I don't know how serious he could even take me. I know I will have to do it again and not laugh, but sometimes they are so cute, it's all you can do. Also, in our house we say..."I'm going to squeeze you til you pop!"

Laura said...

I laughed so hard I cried, and then I laughed some more...and then my sister woke up and came into the room and stared at me like I was crazy...I just don't understand how a kid can be that funny.

Kathryn, Michael & Alex said...

I love childrens thought processes.

Tonight Alex was talking and he said "I want Jesus in my heart so that I can love Him and obey Him and then I will put Him in my mouth and chew Him up and swallow Him so that I can throw Him up and then I get to swallow Him again so that I can have more of Him"

At first I was laughing and then I said "wow"

Kids are so cool.

Jennifer Bacak said...

Yes, we love Hayden too!
And Ryan wondered what you're putting in that kid?
You put it all your genes...and Shazam! Hayden.
It's no surprise to me.
He's awesome.
jenn